Of course she had to come back. She came back sometime yesterday and put an item in my mailbox. I guess she didn't want it. She broke the restraining order once again. I can't prove it because I didn't see her.
The security cameras I bought stopped working when I got my new phone. I have to get that fixed. I spent hours on the phone with tech support. I got one camera working but the others are not working. Had I got her on the camera, I could have pressed charges. She just doesn't get it. She snubs her nose at the restraining order. She doesn't care that the court told her to stay away.
Also she didn't give me back something. She made an agreement that if I gave her a necklace she would give me back a ring. I gave her the necklace and guess what? No ring. I guess I should not be surprised.
more to come...
Saturday, September 26, 2015
Friday, September 25, 2015
HER STUFF IS FINALLY GONE
Today she came to pick up her stuff. After months of making demands of wanting this item or that item. After months of dodging the requests to get her stuff out of my home. After months of negotiations. She finally showed up and took her stuff.
It took me getting a security guard, a neighbor and hiring a helper.
The helper came yesterday to move all the boxes into the middle of the garage. I cordoned off the rest of the garage. That was step 1.
Step two was finding a neighbor to agree to come and be the greeter. The security guard would not come unless there was someone who knew Tracy in attendance. I asked a few neighbors and I heard every excuse. One neighbor said they didn't feel safe being around her. Fair enough. I don't either! Another didn't want to get in the middle of this. A few had work commitments. Can fault them for that! One would only do it if I told Tracy and she agreed to him being there. Forget that! Another had his stag party that night. I told him, forget it you are off the list. I want him to enjoy his party and not think about my mess.
The third step was getting the security guard and getting everyone there on time.
Believe it or not, it all worked out. I was gone at 8:45 am and Tracy was supposed to show up at 9 am. I hear she came with a neighbor. The same neighbor who's phone she used to call me. They made three trips in his little truck. Since they made short trips, they must have transported the boxes to his house. Oh, did I mention his house is only 1.25 blocks away. Probably just over the 100 yards (in the restraining order) away. She must be living there. I am just shocked. She hardly knew him. I was the one friendly with him.
The security guard said she was angry. She would not look at him and would not shake his hand. It took about 1.75 hours. I took the dogs for a long walk and then we sat in my car.
I came home and took out the Wii and played a couple of games of bowling. Then later I saged the house to cleanse it. After I decided I wanted to go to a fancy dinner by myself. I remembered this fancy restaurant that Tracy would never go to. I called and they had room for me. I got some clean clothes on and out I went. I met a really nice bartender Phil, and I got great food. He even gave me a free sorbet.
It is weird. I thought I would feel SO Happy. I don't. Maybe I will tomorrow. I feel sad and weird and like something is missing.
more to come...
It took me getting a security guard, a neighbor and hiring a helper.
The helper came yesterday to move all the boxes into the middle of the garage. I cordoned off the rest of the garage. That was step 1.
Step two was finding a neighbor to agree to come and be the greeter. The security guard would not come unless there was someone who knew Tracy in attendance. I asked a few neighbors and I heard every excuse. One neighbor said they didn't feel safe being around her. Fair enough. I don't either! Another didn't want to get in the middle of this. A few had work commitments. Can fault them for that! One would only do it if I told Tracy and she agreed to him being there. Forget that! Another had his stag party that night. I told him, forget it you are off the list. I want him to enjoy his party and not think about my mess.
The third step was getting the security guard and getting everyone there on time.
Believe it or not, it all worked out. I was gone at 8:45 am and Tracy was supposed to show up at 9 am. I hear she came with a neighbor. The same neighbor who's phone she used to call me. They made three trips in his little truck. Since they made short trips, they must have transported the boxes to his house. Oh, did I mention his house is only 1.25 blocks away. Probably just over the 100 yards (in the restraining order) away. She must be living there. I am just shocked. She hardly knew him. I was the one friendly with him.
The security guard said she was angry. She would not look at him and would not shake his hand. It took about 1.75 hours. I took the dogs for a long walk and then we sat in my car.
I came home and took out the Wii and played a couple of games of bowling. Then later I saged the house to cleanse it. After I decided I wanted to go to a fancy dinner by myself. I remembered this fancy restaurant that Tracy would never go to. I called and they had room for me. I got some clean clothes on and out I went. I met a really nice bartender Phil, and I got great food. He even gave me a free sorbet.
It is weird. I thought I would feel SO Happy. I don't. Maybe I will tomorrow. I feel sad and weird and like something is missing.
more to come...
Tuesday, September 22, 2015
MAKING A DIFFERENCE
Now I am constantly thinking about how I can get involved. What I can do to make a difference. I had this horrible thing, this devastating thing, happen to me and now I want to do something to make it better for the next person. I hear that for most people after a horrendous incident doing something makes them feel better, makes them whole faster.
I just don't know what to do. No one seems to want my help. I called a pet safe program that is supposed to take in your pet if you need to run and don't have anywhere to put your pet. Well, I found out that that is not true. I would have had to be in a shelter in order to put my pet in the pet shelter. I think that is ridiculous. So people who are running for their lives can only have their dogs taken care of for the night if they meet some socio-economic level. Does that seem bizarre to anyone but me? Because I didn't stay in a shelter (that I didn't even know existed) I couldn't board my dogs? So crazy. More bureaucratic bullshit.
This all goes back to the day the cops came to my home to help me get my go bag. They were supposed to give me three pamphlets. They did not. The cop in charge asked me if I had a plan and I said yes and he said fine. No pamphlets. No help. My plan fell through and I was left crying in my car with two dogs and I had not had any food since the night before. What was I going to do? I could not think. If not for the hospitality of strangers, I would have slept in my car and been unsafe all night.
Something needs to change. I want to help make that change.
more to come...
I just don't know what to do. No one seems to want my help. I called a pet safe program that is supposed to take in your pet if you need to run and don't have anywhere to put your pet. Well, I found out that that is not true. I would have had to be in a shelter in order to put my pet in the pet shelter. I think that is ridiculous. So people who are running for their lives can only have their dogs taken care of for the night if they meet some socio-economic level. Does that seem bizarre to anyone but me? Because I didn't stay in a shelter (that I didn't even know existed) I couldn't board my dogs? So crazy. More bureaucratic bullshit.
This all goes back to the day the cops came to my home to help me get my go bag. They were supposed to give me three pamphlets. They did not. The cop in charge asked me if I had a plan and I said yes and he said fine. No pamphlets. No help. My plan fell through and I was left crying in my car with two dogs and I had not had any food since the night before. What was I going to do? I could not think. If not for the hospitality of strangers, I would have slept in my car and been unsafe all night.
Something needs to change. I want to help make that change.
more to come...
Monday, September 21, 2015
INSPECTOR FROM SVU
Today I get a phone call from an inspector from the SVU department. She tells me that I have two choices a) do nothing and the report goes to the court and the judge sees it and b) I go down to SVU and the DA and make another report. The DA then makes a determination if he wants to arrest her. I told the inspector I wanted to wait until after Tracy picks up her stuff on Friday. The inspector says if Tracy comes to the house and picks up her stuff, even if I am not there, I will be putting the restraining order in jeopardy.
I got all upset. But it states in the restraining order that she is supposed to come and pick up her stuff. I called my attorney, some friends. I was a bloody mess. Crying every where and for no reason.
Then I get a phone call from a Domestic Violence Advocate. Out of the blue. Well, not out of the blue, I guess the SVU Inspector gave her my number. Funny that five months after I got my original TRO I finally get a call from a domestic violence advocate. Of course I balled on the phone to her too. I said I was a mess this week. I swear if there was a Hallmark ad on TV I would have cried at that too.
more to come...
I got all upset. But it states in the restraining order that she is supposed to come and pick up her stuff. I called my attorney, some friends. I was a bloody mess. Crying every where and for no reason.
Then I get a phone call from a Domestic Violence Advocate. Out of the blue. Well, not out of the blue, I guess the SVU Inspector gave her my number. Funny that five months after I got my original TRO I finally get a call from a domestic violence advocate. Of course I balled on the phone to her too. I said I was a mess this week. I swear if there was a Hallmark ad on TV I would have cried at that too.
more to come...
Friday, September 18, 2015
FALLOUT FROM THE PHONE CALL
After Tracy called I called my attorney. She said to call the police and make a report. Then my step mother called and said yet again Tracy called her to ask her to call me. These are both against the restraining order rules. It was clear I would have to report this to the police.
On my way to work, I called and sat on hold for 20 minutes. I gave up. Later on I called again and got through. The lady told me I needed to go into the precinct to make a report. On my way home I dropped by the precinct. They told me it would take hours to have an officer free to take a report. They said it would be better for me to go home and have an officer come to my house. I went home and called to have an officer come to my home to make a report. I called at 6-6:30 pm. At 2:30 am my doorbell rang. It was the officers coming by to take the report. I was in my PJs.
They listened to the recording (I forgot to say that Tracy left a voicemail on my machine before I picked up the phone) and listened to my story and dates and times of the phone calls. They told me this report would go to the DA and the court. Then they left.
more to come...
On my way to work, I called and sat on hold for 20 minutes. I gave up. Later on I called again and got through. The lady told me I needed to go into the precinct to make a report. On my way home I dropped by the precinct. They told me it would take hours to have an officer free to take a report. They said it would be better for me to go home and have an officer come to my house. I went home and called to have an officer come to my home to make a report. I called at 6-6:30 pm. At 2:30 am my doorbell rang. It was the officers coming by to take the report. I was in my PJs.
They listened to the recording (I forgot to say that Tracy left a voicemail on my machine before I picked up the phone) and listened to my story and dates and times of the phone calls. They told me this report would go to the DA and the court. Then they left.
more to come...
Thursday, September 17, 2015
SHE CALLED
I came home from walking the dogs and the phone was ringing. I picked it up and looked at the caller ID. It was a neighbor's phone number. I answered and it was Tracy on the phone. I was so shocked because a) the caller ID said a neighbor's name and b) she isn't supposed to be calling me because of the restraining order. I informed her that she is in violation of the restraining order and she said she knew but she needed to tell me something. She thought me attorney was not telling me everything.
See, Tracy was supposed to confirm that she was going to pick up her boxes on Friday by Tuesday. This was now Thursday and the move had been called off. For her to be able to pick up her stuff there are a lot of moving pieces that had to come together. That was why there was a deadline. Now she wanted me to put the moving pieces back together in 24 hours. I was inclined to do it just to get her junk out of my home.
I could not pull it together. So we rescheduled for next Friday.
more to come...
See, Tracy was supposed to confirm that she was going to pick up her boxes on Friday by Tuesday. This was now Thursday and the move had been called off. For her to be able to pick up her stuff there are a lot of moving pieces that had to come together. That was why there was a deadline. Now she wanted me to put the moving pieces back together in 24 hours. I was inclined to do it just to get her junk out of my home.
I could not pull it together. So we rescheduled for next Friday.
more to come...
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