IT"S ALL ABOUT YOU

Why isn't it ever about me?

I think back about the times it should have been about me but you made it all about you.  You were anxious, you were nervous, you had to leave, you didn't want to go, you couldn't be left alone.

There was my graduation from graduate school.  You made it all about you by throwing a fit when things didn't go your way.  My parents came all the way to see me walk down the aisle.  They planned a nice dinner and allowed me to invite a few friends at a very fancy restaurant.  But you had to make it all about you because you didn't want to be left alone with them and wanted me to be with you.  But I needed to be with my classmates to walk down the aisle.  You bought me a lei of flowers and my parents bought me a bouquet.  It was a competition in your eyes.  Why couldn't it just be a nice celebration?

Then there was the time I was in the hospital and you wanted me to checkout so you wouldn't have to stay home alone.  I understood you were anxious but who would checkout of the hospital early just so you would not have to stay home alone?  You were serious about me coming home.  You kept pressuring me to leave the hospital.

When I would go to the emergency room, you used to come with me but then you stopped.  I had to go on my own or have neighbors take me.  They all thought it was weird that you would let your loved one go to the emergency room while you sat home watching TV.  But when you need to go to any doctor's appointment it was clear that I had to escort you because you were so anxious about going.

When did this shift happen?  When did I become so insignificant in our relationship?  When did it become all about you?

more to come...